Poll

Today, while engaging in a riveting therapy session with one of the adolescents at the group home where I work, I noticed that his cap had an interesting logo. I inquired, and he handed me the cap. I examined it and learned that the logo was that of the Chicago American Giants, a Negro League team. Needless to say, I want that hat. Here is my question to all of you: Should I purchase and wear a Negro League cap? Am I implicitly endorsing and glorifying a league that was born out of racial segregation or am I celebrating the achievements of said team? The answer would be easy if I were Black. However, I am not, nor have I ever been, African-American.

The Voldie Oldie

"Suspicious Minds" (Elvis Presley, 1969)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"Don't burn it with the chametz."

- RBP, re. handout

Oh, the memories

http://homestarrunner.com/sbemail176.html
See which examples remind you of which friends.... Gaby, if you're still cleaning out NCSY washrooms with your toothbrush, this is for you!

I'm back baby!

That's all.

Ephraim Stulberg on Ki Teitzei, 5767 - "New and Improved Weekly D'var Torah"

Hi there,

Long time no speak.

This week's portion contains the commandment against taking both the mother bird and her chicks (22:6). Both Rambam (Moreh Ha-nevukhim III;48) and Ramban understand the prohibition as being motivated by God's desire that we not behave cruelly towards animals.

Both Rambam and Ramban are then forced to reconcile their explanations with the Mishnah's ruling against inserting the phrase "Your mercy extends to even a bird's nest" within one's prayers, seemingly implying that the commandment ought not to be rationalized along those lines but rather accepted as God's command and nothing more.

Rambam reacts to this, as well as other midrashim which seem to deny the role of ta'amei hamitzvos in Jewish thought, by positing that there were in fact divergent schools of thought in this regard. While some rabbis rejected the philosophization the commandments, others clearly believed the practice to be constructive. Rambam adopted the latter approach, to which he devoted the bulk of the third part of the Moreh.

By contrast, Ramban attempts to harmonize the seemingly disparate midrashim. He argues that while no one ever rejected the notion that God's commandments contained deep ethical lessons, and were worthy of obeisance above and beyond the mere divinity of their origins, the notion that the particular acts mandated by the Divine Will were necessary to God is blasphemous. The fact that we slaughter animals from the throat rather than the nape, for instance, is meant solely to impress us with the ideal of mercy; from God's point of view all thatmatters is that His word is fulfilled.

Likewise, continues Ramban, the purpose of shiluah ha-qen is not so that the birds will not be anguished; it is rather that we should be impressed with the importance of not causing other beings to suffer, etc. God is unconcerned with the suffering of animals; He is interested solely in the moral development of mankind.

Without digging to deeply into what is certainly a thorny topic, I nonetheless wish to point out that Ramban's intensely anthropocentric position is clearly at odds with Rambam's general attitude (e.g., Moreh III:13). Indeed, while Rambam explains shiluah ha-qen as being instituted in order to not actually cause anguish to the mother - a feeling which, while existing on a lower level than human suffering, is nonetheless real and a legitimate object of God's concern - Ramban comes close to denying the very existence of animal distress.

Does Rambam's rejection of the Mishnah's underlying hashqapha carry over from his philosophical work to his halakhic? In a word, no (see Hilkhos Tefillah 9:7). It is interesting to speculate over why this might be, but I'll leave that for another time.

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"A Coke of can"

- DR

The Voldie Oldie

"Who Knows Where the Time Goes" (Judy Collins, 1968)

Ouch

Let it be known that I love dogs. As TF can attest, my license plate was my dog's (zp'l- zecher puppy lebracha) name.
Regarding admitted dog torturer Michael Vick, I just read on ESPN.com that "Vick admitted to creating a betting ring for dogfighting. In doing so, he lost his $130 million partnership with the Falcons." This doesn't even include Vick's lost endorsements.
On one hand, I feel sorry for Vick because he was fun to watch- although I won't miss John Madden repeating his name every 30 seconds... But let it be known that those who abuse dogs will pay!!!
Therefore, I hereby warn all those who have thoughts of hurting dogs- Gaby get your hot dogs from the supermarket like everyone else- that ye shall be punished!
Oh, and I officially do not like Michael Vick any more.

The Voldie Oldie

"Reflections" (The Supremes, 1967)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"If you put your fingers in your ears, Yehuda, you won't feel that draft anymore."

- SG

The Voldie Oldie

"In My Life" (The Beatles, 1965)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"It's the same, only different."

-RBC

From Baseball Shorts

"If a tie is like kissing your sister, losing is like kissing your grandmother with her teeth out."

- George Brett

The Voldie Oldie

"Your Latest Trick" (Dire Straits, 1986)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"That is not a talent; that is an abnormality."

- EA, re. GS's leg-behind-the-head trick

From Baseball Shorts

"How can a guy win a game if you don't give him any runs?"

- Bo Belinsky, after losing a game 15-0

The Voldie Oldie

"Walk Away Renee" (The Left Banke, 1966)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"I have sex. I mean six. Stop talking through me, Gaby."

- HK

From Baseball Shorts

"Yeah, what paper you write for, Ernie?"

- Yogi Berra, on being introduced to writer Ernest Hemingway

The Voldie Oldie

"Ordinary World" (Duran Duran, 1993)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"Two-fifty each. All you have to do is give me your conscience."

- MF the Elder, re. "stolen" cutlery from Viva's

From Baseball Shorts

"It actually giggles at you as it goes by."

- Rick Monday, on Phil Niekro's knuckleball

The Voldie Oldie

"Lucky Man" (Emerson, Lake and Palmer, 1971)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"I love Jay Shore."

- JB, who forced the entire gym class to say it

From Baseball Shorts

"The motto of the team I played for was 'win or else.' I didn't know what the 'else' meant, and I never wanted to learn."

- Chuck Cary, re. Japan

Mazal Tov!

We (whomever that may be) would like to wish a hearty (I guess that it has larger chunks) mazal tov to the dear Wifey on officially becoming an R.D. - registered dietitian. Or, as TF correctly pointed out R.D. = registered dishwasher-- if only....
Also...it is official: apparently TF was the whitest person in all of downtown Toronto this afternoon. There were several reports of people having to wear sunglasses on the subway in order to avoid damaging their retinal area while being in close proximity to you-know-who. (He took the Potter quiz also.)

The Voldie Oldie

"Come See About Me" (The Supremes, 1964)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"Sid... You've grown on me, Sid."

- UH, making farewells, addressing DS

From Baseball Shorts

"An hour after the game, you want to go out and play them again."

- Rocky Bridges, re. Japan

Does Anyone Know the Whereabouts of Maxiebaby & Wife?

At this point in time many people are speculating that the notorious criminals Maxibaby & Wife are currently in hiding in a foreign country. When reached for comment about his shameful brother, all Captain Salamander could muster was "as their legal councel I can neither confirm or deny the scurrilous, baseless and absurd allegations. Moreover, my clients intend to rigorously enforce their legal right to privacy in the face of your (Gaby 'n Fish) continuous harassment."

In other words, Captain Salamander believes that his brother and sister in-law are currently seeking asylum in Cambodia where many unlawful practices including embezzlement are not only accepted but are encouraged. If you or anyone you know has any information concerning the whereabouts of Maxiebaby & Wife please do not hesitate to inform the local authorities. Do not attempt to apprehend the criminals on your own, they are extremely dangerous and are mostly likely armed (in fact according to intelligence reports they are each likely to bear two arms).

Embezzlement?

I ask a question to Maxiebaby & Wife: Where has all the money from the blog gone? If I remember correctly there was an absolute explosion in revenues only weeks after the Adsense money maker was added to our blog, where is all of that money? How come we never get reports? The silence is disturbing. We need an explanation.

Pension

If I were to retire today, how much money would I get from the blog's revenues toward my pension?

Could Someone Please Tell Pi to Lose the Last 20 Digits?

The Voldie Oldie

"Tonite Is a Wonderful Time to Fall in Love" (April Wine, 1975)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"How many surrealist painters does it take to change a light bulb?"
"A fish."

- MF the Elder

From Baseball Shorts

"Get an intentional walk."

- Nolan Ryan, asked if there was anything in baseball that he had never done

Which Harry Potter Character Are You?

Apparently I'm Remus Lupin (here). Strange, seeing as I can barely grow any facial hair.

Moronic Scammers

You know how much we love scams here (actually here, here, and here) at Gaby's Gobbledygook (Jon, you working on that new title yet?) so I couldn't resist posting what is possibly the most incomprehensible scam story in recent memory. The following article somehow made the front page of the Ottawa Citizen on August 14th, 2007:

Canadian Embassy foils kidnapping

Officials help Australian farmer held captive in Mali by Internet-bride scammers

Jean-François Bertrand, The Ottawa Citizen; with files from Reuters

Published: Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Des Gregor, an Australian sheep farmer kidnapped in Mali where he'd gone to meet "Natacha," an Internet bride, owes his freedom to the Canadian Embassy.

The 56-year-old was the victim of a con -- last month he flew from South Australia to the African country looking for love.

And a $100,000 dowry in gold bars.

Instead, he was kidnapped soon after landing in Bamako, the capital. Machete-wielding bandits kept him hostage for 12 days and told him they'd hack off his limbs one by one unless his family paid a $100,000 ransom.

But with the help of officials at the Canadian Embassy -- Australia doesn't have an embassy in Mali, so Canada provides them with consular service -- the scammers were scammed.

"The embassy became the control centre for the police operation," explained Mr. Gregor, reached yesterday at his farm in Hoyleton, South Australia, about 100 kilometres north of Adelaide.

From that base of operation, an Australian Federal Police officer was in contact with the sheep farmer's brother, Wilf.

At the same time, the victim was also talking with his brother, from the single bedroom apartment where he was detained, "with one bloke always sleeping at the door."

The demands made by "those people," as Mr. Gregor calls his captors, were relayed back to the Canadian Embassy in Bamako.

In the middle of the afternoon last Wednesday, Mr. Gregor walked into the embassy -- and into freedom, though he didn't know it yet at the time.

"I was greeted by a Mr. Diego, a Canadian, and the Australian Federal Police officer. They were to take me to the bank to get the money," said the victim.

Mr. Gregor still feared for his life. He thought that even if he paid his captors the ransom, they still "would have killed me. I'd be dead."

But he learned that police, Australian and Mali, had duped the kidnappers into letting him into the embassy to collect the ransom.

The secure building became a safe haven for the bachelor. "It's like they had kidnapped me, but under much better conditions," he joked.

He slept at the embassy and was taken to a hotel for breakfast and a shower the next day. Back at the embassy, he stayed under the protection of Canadian officials until Friday evening, when he flew out of the country.

"The embassy bent over backwards to accommodate us, they were just fantastic," he said emotionally. "They were magnificent."

Canada provides consular services for Australian citizens in Mali under an agreement with Australia, Department of Foreign Affairs spokesman Réjean Beaulieu said yesterday. He confirmed that Canada provided "consular assistance" to an Australian citizen, but could not provide further details because of privacy rules.

Mr. Gregor wasn't the only one who flew out of the country. After he arrived to Australia, he cancelled his credit cards and found that one had been used to buy two airline tickets on two different routes for $1,700.

When Mr. Gregor arrived in Mali, he was to meet "Natacha," whom he had met on the Internet. She had posed as a refugee from Liberia and the couple decided to wed after a whirlwind online romance. There was even someone posing as a minister helping him contact her. "When it's a minister, you don't think you're going to get in trouble," Mr. Gregor said.

"You have to be careful, you can't trust anybody," he added to his cautionary tale.

It is not the first time a love-struck Des Gregor travelled across the world. Three years ago he went to Russia in search of a bride, but came back empty handed.

The sheep farmer, who feels ridiculed by Australian media, is not currently searching for love through his computer.

Australian Federal Police seized it in search of clues.

------------------------------------------------------


Everyone involved in this story is a complete moron. It's as simple as that. There's obviously no need to explain the brilliance of Des Gregor, the sheep farmer, but the scammers have some serious explaining to do. What exactly happened here? Which bloke was responsible for allowing Des to walk into the embassy 'to collect the ransom'? Also, how on earth was this plan even concocted? And what exactly did the Canadian Embassy do that deserves such high praise, other than just having a location in Mali? This whole story makes absolutely no sense to me. I'm so confused.

The World's Funniest Jew?

Apparently, there is a 75% chance that Stephen Colbert is the World's Funniest Jew.

Watch the interview with Dr. Spencer Wells at this link:

http://www.comedycentral.com/shows/the_colbert_report/videos/celebrity_interviews/index.jhtml

Now he can be his own token Jewish friend.

The Voldie Oldie

"For What It's Worth" (The Buffalo Springfield, 1967)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"This Shabbos you know you will be having a Shabbaton... in the Westboro area, at the so-called 'Young Israel' synagogue."

- RBP

From Baseball Shorts

"I'll tell you how smart Pete is. When they had the blackout in New York, he was stranded 13 hours on an escalator."

- Joe Nuxhall, on Pete Rose

Finally, we can get even fatter!

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/08/15/dining/15vend.html?ex=1344916800&en=9aca61a0d5cf920b&ei=5124&partner=permalink&exprod=permalink

Dining & Wine

For Kosher Emergencies, Manna From a Machine

By KIM SEVERSON

Published: August 15, 2007

The nation’s first glatt kosher vending machine that can shoot out a hot knish was installed at Hackensack University Medical Center in New Jersey.

No, my wife didn't make me write that title....
p.s. Touro plans on opening up a medical school based in that hospital within a year or so.

R' Slifkin would be proud

A bold foray into the science and Torah debate by the man who brought you the AFC preview. It comes right after the Houston Texans preview in this link:
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=easterbrookpreview/070814&sportCat=nfl

A cosmic thought: TMQ often notes that each time instruments improve, the universe appears larger and grander. Recently, astronomers led by Richard Ellis of the California Institute of Technology found light from the oldest-known galaxies: from the moment of "cosmic dawn." Current theory says the cosmos began 13-14 billion years ago during the Big Bang. For the first 300,000 years or so after the Big Bang, all matter existed in a blurred state; no stars had formed, so the heavens were utterly dark. (Initially, the universe "was a formless void and darkness covered the face of the deep" -- Genesis 1:2.) About 300,000 years after creation, the first stars coalesced. Light shone into the black, and there came cosmic dawn. ("And God saw that the light was good … and there was evening and there was morning, the first day.") Now, the Cal Tech astronomers think they have glimpsed the light of the first day -- faint emissions from the first galaxies that formed from the earliest stars.

Happy Birthday, He Who Must Not Be Named

On your birthday ♥ I have so many things I want to write here, but I also want to avoid spoilers for the seventh Potter book. For those of you who may not have a had a chance to read it yet, it was rather entertaining, except for the first 400 pages where Harry isn't sure if Dumbledore is really Voldem-rt and the last 400 pages where Hagrid and Lucius Malfoy play a fascinating game of muggle checkers, really quite thrilling (includes a rare quadruple jump near the end, but I won't spoil who jumps who).

why gaby doesn't cycle...

TOKYO, Japan (Reuters) -- A Japanese biker failed to notice his leg had been severed below the knee when he hit a safety barrier, and rode on for 2 km (1.2 miles), leaving a friend to pick up the missing limb.

The 54-year-old office worker was out on his motorcycle with a group of friends in the city of Hamamatsu, west of Tokyo, on Monday, when he was unable to negotiate a curve in the road and bumped into the central barrier, the Mainichi Shimbun said.

He felt excruciating pain, but did not notice that his right leg was missing until he stopped at the next junction, the paper quoted local police as saying.

The man and his leg were taken to hospital, but the limb had been crushed in the collision, the paper said.

P.S. you gotta feel for that friend who had to catch up with the severed leg...

Happy Birthday, Tommy

On your birthday ♥ May the Leafs have more wins than last year, but more of last year than wins and also that makes no sense.

What a Great Sport!

NASCAR Coach Reveals Winning Strategy: 'Drive Fast'

There's More Harry Potter

Apparently, the Chinese love Harry Potter so much that they write their own Harry Potter books and publish them under JK Rowling's name. Here are some excerpts and publisher's summaries.

----

Harry Potter and the Big Funnel

After six years at Hogwarts, Harry Potter becomes an intern sorcerer and is assigned to teach at the Honiton School. Harry has a painful time in his aunt’s house, as Dudley has met a belly-dancing girl. As Harry prepares to report to his job, Bat Bug warns him disaster awaits.

At the school, his students become wooden stools one after another. Harry doesn’t know whether an evil student is behind this, or if his old benefactor Hagrid is making a mistake, or if the shadow of Voldemort has returned. Did it have something to do with the big funnel?

---

Harry Potter and the Chinese Porcelain Doll

Harry Potter learns that Mysterious Man (Voldemort) is going to China to persuade his rival Yandomort to attack Harry as well as the Western magic world. Harry decides to find Chinese Porcelain Doll, who could beat Yandomort in China. On a passenger steamer, Harry makes friends with Long Long and Xing Xing, who are part of a Chinese circus. It turns out that Naughty Bubble, the boy who usually bullied Xing Xing at the circus, was Yandomort. After Voldemort killed Naughty Bubble’s mother, Big Spinach, he took Naughty Bubble as his disciple, and taught him black magic to make him become Yandomort.

---

Harry Potter and the Leopard-Walk-Up-to-Dragon

Harry becomes a fat, hairy dwarf after being caught in a “sour and sweet rain”; he loses all his magic and can get it back only by obtaining the magic ring. After he does, Harry becomes a dragon that fights evil. Voldemort has an even more powerful brother who makes trouble for Harry.

Excerpt: Harry doesn’t know how long it will take to wash the sticky cake off his face. For a civilized young man, it is disgusting to have dirt on any part of his body. He lies in the elegant bathtub, keeps wiping his face, and thinks about Dudley’s face, which is as fat as Aunt Petunia’s bottom.

---

Harry Potter and the Waterproof Pearl

With the help of Gandalf and Peter, Harry Potter and the Little Warriors find the sea city in the desert. They go through a keyhole into a mysterious land, where they get gold armor and kill the head of the monsters. On their triumphant return, Hermione disappears. Dumbledore tells Harry that Hermione has been kidnapped by a monster. With help from his friends, Harry obtains the waterproof pearl. To rescue Hermione, Harry barges into the Dragon Palace alone to have a showdown with the Dragon King.

---

Harry Potter and the Half-Blooded Relative Prince

Harry realizes that his magic powers need improvement. He transfers to Qroutes School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, the biggest and most exclusive school of witchcraft and wizardry on the Royal Continent. But appallingly, Harry becomes a blood-lust monster. He is finally beaten by his classmates.

Excerpt: Summoning charms? Everybody was surprised. Summoning was a kind of magic, but under normal circumstances, Harry had only basic skills in summoning low-class monsters. ... However, the black smoke that emerged from his hand showed the monster summoned by his art was at least some senior magic beast with special energy. ... How could he get a senior beast out of nowhere within only one month’s time? Nobody had ever heard of a magic beast named Little Fatty Fortune; certainly no one knew this was just a name that Harry invented himself. Everybody was eager to know how Little Fatty Fortune would perform, except for one person. That was Andoga.

---

Harry Potter and Platform Nine and Three-Quarters

Excerpt: This was a secret I had cherished in my heart for seven days. It scratched my heart and made it itch, and I decided not to tell anyone of it. But when I saw Hedwig, my owl, jumping outside my window, I knew it was the call from Hogwarts for me. Yes, it was I who had received the Hogwarts admission letter! I could not tell anyone of this, I would ride on my favorite flying broom, together with Hedwig and my magic wand, go-go-go, night clouds in the urban sky would cover my trails, and the meteor you saw in the sky was my traipsing manteau.

---

Harry Potter and the Showdown

Harry makes his last visit to No. 4 Privet Drive, and his aunt and uncle are surprisingly kind to him. Snape shows up unexpectedly to ruin Bill’s wedding. Professor McGonagall reopens Hogwarts with Professor Slughorn as her deputy.

Snape breaks into Hogwarts and rescues Lucius Malfoy from Azkaban Prison. Harry believes that he can defeat Snape and Voldemort only by strenuously practicing charms. Professor Slughorn, inspired by a book from the East provided by Cho Chang called “Thirty-Six Strategies,” devises a plan enabling Harry to seize Snape in the Ministry of Magic. But Gryffindor’s sword, which hung in the headmaster’s office, assassinates Professor McGonagall.

When Harry confronts Voldemort at Azkaban, the Dark Lord tries to win Harry over as a fellow descendant of Slytherin. Harry refuses, and together with Ron and Hermione, kills Voldemort instead. Now what will Harry do about his two girlfriends?

Excerpt: Harry appeared to be extremely powerless in front of Snape, and he even became a little pessimistic. No matter whether he was in a car or at the Burrow, he felt his hands and feet could not fully extend. He wanted to ride on Buckbeak, to fly in the vast sky where he could enjoy doing something at which he excelled.

Buckbeak might be searching for food in Hogwarts’ Forbidden Forest as he received a signal from Harry’s magic wand. It would take him some time to reach Harry, perhaps five minutes. Though that was much faster than a car — Ron would need at least three hours to get to Hogwarts — the mere five minutes were so long for Harry. He wanted to fly into the blue sky immediately.

---

Harry Potter and the Chinese Overseas Students at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Seeing the evil Black Monster approaching the magic world, Dumbledore turns to the Chinese sorcery school Nine Mysteries for help. The school sends six teenage wizards, who with their mysterious magical arts astonish Hogwarts and transform the lives of Harry and his friends.

During their time with the Chinese students, Harry, Hermione and Ron gain the courage to beat Voldemort and Draco frees himself from the shadow of his family. When Hogwarts’ magic protection fails, Voldemort leads Death Eaters, werewolves, dementors and giants in a merciless campaign against the castle. Harry Potter together with the Chinese students fights Voldemort.

Excerpt: “But it seems someone is coming today. Look.” Hermione made them look where Professor McGonagall was standing. There was the Sorting Hat to the side, and she, Dumbledore and the other teachers seemed not to care about the food on their plates. They looked to the doorway from time to time, as if expecting something.

“Sorting Hat? Are new students coming?” Ron said with confusion, stretching his neck to see what was outside.

At that moment, Hagrid’s broad silhouette appeared. He had a smile on this face and strode towards Dumbledore, saying, “Here they come.” Dumbledore smiled with relief, as if a long-awaited thing had been finally realized, and he declared with joy, “Let them in, quick!”

He slowly rose up, making an announcement to all the students: “Attention, everybody. Let’s welcome these overseas students from China’s Nine Mysteries School. They’re going to study in Hogwarts starting today.”

The Onion being serious

Destruction Of National Pastime Given Two-Minute Standing Ovation

SAN FRANCISCO—A sellout crowd rose to its feet and exploded into ecstatic cheers Tuesday night as Barry Bonds completed the downfall of America's most revered sport by hitting a thundering 435-foot shot into the right center field bleachers for career home run No. 756 and tainting baseball's most beloved record.

Celebrations broke out throughout AT&T Park and thousands of flashbulbs went off as Bonds took his ceremonial trip around the bases, his arms raised in a jubilant gesture of triumph as he completed his desecration of baseball. Fireworks filled the night sky to mark the utter destruction of the national pastime, a scramble for the infamous baseball broke out in the stands, and the game was interrupted for 10 minutes in the bottom of the fifth to mark the shameful occasion.

Mike Bacsik, the pitcher who made the difficult and admirable decision to pitch to Bonds as if he were a normal player, and who will forever be known as the man whose fastball was sent out of the park along with the last remnant of baseball's self-respect, could only watch. Bonds would later present Bacsik with an autographed bat.

Moments after Bonds crossed home plate into the loving arms of his family and the eventual judgment of history, he addressed the fans, thanking them for their support on his long, hard road of perverting baseball.

"Thank you very much. I got to thank all of you, all the fans here in San Francisco. It's been fantastic," he said to his deluded and complicit home crowd as his godfather Willie Mays, a fading symbol of what baseball once was, stood at his side.

As soon as Bonds completed his self-congratulation, a self-conscious gasp could be heard as a videotaped message from Hank Aaron was played over the video screen, sending surprise and a fleeting moment of uncomfortable self-awareness through both the crowd and Bonds himself.

"Throughout the past century, the home run has held a special place in baseball and I have been privileged to hold this record for 33 of those years," said Aaron, whose legacy of persevering with profound personal dignity through racism and persecution to become the all-time home run leader will hopefully not be tarnished by public acknowledgment of Bonds.

"I move over now and offer my best wishes to Barry and his family on this historic achievement," Aaron concluded, displaying infinitely more grace than Bonds, baseball fans, and perhaps even baseball itself had any right to ask of him.

Bonds then presented his helmet, gloves, and bat to a steward of the Baseball Hall of Fame for shipment to Cooperstown, where they will be enshrined forever, allowing fathers and sons to come and stare at them glumly as they bear mute witness to baseball's diminished glory.

The Nationals won the game, 8-6.

It's a bad day when The Onion doesn't need to resort to making up stories.

Vote Rhino in the Next Election

But which one?

I was listening "As it Happens" in the car this evening (definitely my favourite radio program on CBC, and also as it happens my favourite intro music) and I found this interview particularly amusing:

Download Link (3.9 mb)

As an aside, doesn't Francois Gourd sound like one of the characters from Radio Free Vestibule?

Where hath all the bloggers gone?

Time for a new challenge, stay tuned.

The Voldie Oldie

"Every Bit of Love" (Ken Tobias, 1975)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"Yeah - Jerry Garcia was actually teaching biology."

- DS, re. theory SG in Israel all of previous year (included by popular demand)

From Baseball Shorts

"The kid is the greatest proof of reincarnation. Nobody could get that stupid in one lifetime."

- Joe McCarthy, after a player was thrown out trying to steal home with one out