The Voldie Oldie

"At My Most Beautiful" (R.E.M., 1999)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"A Coke of can"

- RBP

Mazel Tov

To Noam Gross on the birth of a baby girl.

JFJ and Me

So last week I was at a Leaf game in Philadelphia with my brothers-in-law, and we arrived at the arena an hour and a quarter before game time so that we could watch the pre-game skate. As we were walking toward the main entrance of the arena, a cab pulled up and out stepped John Ferguson Jr. (the Leaf's GM). After I got over my initial shock (I would have thought that he would enter with the team through a players entrance), I approached him and asked if we could take a picture with him. Afterwards, as it was still well before game time and there was almost no one else around, I engaged him in hockey talk. I asked him if Andrew Raycroft was going to start in goal again that night and he confirmed that he was. (Needless to say, the Leafs lost - it's hard to win in the NHL with an open net). I then asked him about conflicting reports on mapleleafs.com and tsn.ca regarding the nature of Vesa Toskala's injury (the flu versus a groin pull) and he verified that in fact Toskala had a slight groin pull. I thought that this was pretty cool as I had just received an injury update directly from an NHL GM. Then we proceeded to talk about the McCabe injury and how it detracted from the Leafs powerplay.

As it turns out, he's actually quite a nice guy. Kind of makes me feel guilty about wanting him fired.

The Voldie Oldie

"Sunny Came Home" (Shawn Colvin, 1996)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"Everybody be quiet, Max."

- MM

A Note on Fears Regarding Internet Use

A considerable number of current orthodox Jewish religious leaders, halachic authorities, and publications are hesitant or disinclined to permit internet use. I believe one of their principal reasons for objecting to internet use is the danger that the user will end up employing the internet for religiously inappropriate or prohibited purposes, in particular the accessing of pornography and other forms of sexually explicit material readily available on the internet.

In determining his attitude toward internet use, the halachic decisor must consider how much weight to assign this danger. (He must also evaluate and weigh the need for and/or benefits of internet use, but that is not the subject of this post.) In this regard, I have heard numbers bandied about regarding the widespread use of the internet for pornography and related purposes, presumably from surveys of American society; possibly from surveys of other industrialized countries as well. My input on this matter is merely the following: Studies regarding internet use for pornography etc. in society will not necessarily help our halachic decisor determine how much weight to assign this concern. Allow me to explain.

Consider a study designed to determine the likelihood that an American who enters into an A&P supermarket will buy and subsequently eat non-kosher food. My guess is such a study would find that a considerable percentage, probably a majority, would buy and eat non-kosher. Should our halachic decisor therefore conclude that no Jew should walk into an A&P, because of the great statistical danger that if he does, he will end up eating non-kosher? Obviously this argument is absurd. The flaw in it is that the study considers a population sample consisting mainly of people who have no reason not to eat non-kosher food, whereas an orthodox Jew does have such a reason. The study offers no data about people whose values include eating only kosher. Consequently, the study will not assist in predicting the likelihood that an orthodox Jew will buy and eat non-kosher food if he walks into an A&P. It's the wrong study to answer that question.

It is reasonable to assume that a considerably higher percentage of orthodox Jews than of the American, or Western, population at large consider not looking at pornography and other sexually explicit material to be a major value. Therefore, analogous to the A&P example, a study about internet use for pornography in any Western society will not assist - at least not much - in predicting the likelihood that an orthodox Jew will look at pornography if he uses the internet. Therefore, if such studies are quoted in this regard, their limited predictive powers regarding orthodox Jewish behaviour should be acknowledged.

(Obviously, this argument does not apply to a study specifically (a) about orthodox Jews, or (b) about a population sample from which one can reasonably extrapolate conclusions about orthodox Jews.)

The Voldie Oldie

"Only Love Can Break Your Heart" (Neil Young, 1970)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"Also known by his other name - Bill Zit."

- SG, re. video writer William Whitehead

The Voldie Oldie

"Shilo" (Neil Diamond, 1968)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"He was a mussar terrorist. He got his talmidim to blow themselves up inside."

- RBC, re. the Alter of Nevardhok

Ads by Google

The Voldie Oldie

"O-o-h Child" (The Five Stairsteps, 1970)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"They're fine, really, they're fine; they're just normally obnoxious, you know, boys of that age."

- EA, re. 1999-2000 Grade 10's

The Fireplace

As requested by Gaby N' Fish



I (or most likely the better EBP) will post the rest of the pics to ben-porat.com at some point.
I hate uploading pictures one by one.

The Jew's Minor Misfortunes

You are reminded why you swore you'd never go to that minyan again.

COOL!

Age of Aquarius

Gaby N' Fish Caught With Another Man

I love you too...

I finally figured who taught Gaby to dance

Humourous, non-fart related video

This Land! | Funny Jokes at JibJab

Genuis

Almost as smart as the Jack Bauer impersonation...except this is real.

The Voldie Oldie

"All the Way to Reno" (R.E.M., 2001)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"It hurts."

- HK, talking like Fozzy

24: The Unaired 1994 Pilot

Thanks Maxiebaby for bringing this gem to my attention. Ahhh... the good old days!

Too Bad the Flash Video Contest is Over

The Voldie Oldie

"Green Tambourine" (The Lemon Pipers, 1967)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"Under 'Sex', it doesn't say 'Yes, please'."

- anon, re. Fermat Contest answer form

Best Commercial Ever

Brilliant choreography

Here is an homage to what, if I remember correctly, is a song off of Tommy's favorite album. I also think that Tommy will especially enjoy how they were able create this video despite an all male prison population

.

When is Doughboy going to get himself one of these?

The Dark Lord's Dictionary

Ugly, adj. Aesthetically displeasing. Washington Heights in the winter is windy and ugly. Washington Heights in the summer is sticky and ugly.

Chris Chelios an Ottawa Senator

I know this hasn't been reported anywhere, but I've used scientific methods that Eklund himself would consider impressive. I was just in the Loblaws at College Square and I saw a man who looked exactly like Chris Chelios, only it wasn't one of those 'hey, that guy looks a lot like x' rather it was one of those times when I could not remove my eyes from this man's face. I tried with all my mental capacity, but I just couldn't look away. I think that's the litmus test for identifying famous people, if you can't stop looking, it must be them.

Anyhow, that got me thinking that the Red Wings are probably not on tap to play the Senators in Ottawa anytime soon, so the only logical conclusion is that Chelios has been traded to the Senators. Not sure who they gave up in return for the ageless wonder, but it's kind of cool that Chelios decided to live in my neighbourhood. Maybe he'll even be attending the same shul as me, actually he strikes me as more of a Mendelsson type of guy, oh well.

To make Gaby feel better

Quick Medical Question

I've had this really nasty cold (flu?) for the past week and by my best guestimate I think that I've expelled at least several litres of snot from my nose. Where does it all come from? My nose is rather large, but it couldn't possibly hold that much strange green fluid, that would be a stretch.

I expect at least two plausible explanation from Dr. Maxiebaby & Wife so that I can move on with my life.

The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny

I have to admit that while I did enjoy the flash video with the above title, I'm even more excited that it's almost off the home page and in the archives because every single time I come to our blog it automatically starts up and I'm pretty sure I have the whole 10 minute video committed to memory.

Back from Maui... (New Contest)

Had to post this picture. I couldn't get a more clear image as the janitor covered it up after she saw me taking pictures of it.

Yes, it does say "Male cleaning in progress".

The one who can explain what it means wins the contest.

The Voldie Oldie

"The Way I Feel" (Gordon Lightfoot, 1967)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"You gave a dirty look to the watch and then you looked at me, as if to say, 'Rabbi, come on - it's almost ten o'clock.'"

- RBP (ten o'clock being the end of class)

Trivia Question

Where does the Bible state that Russian politicians don't praise God?

The Voldie Oldie

"Time in a Bottle" (Jim Croce, 1973)

QUOTI OF THE DAY

"Hey, I thought you guys didn't watch tv."

- JJ, repeated countless times

Awww, it's baby Hudi

Ok fine, it's a 41 pound Chinese baby. Whatever.

"Santa Claus Is A Black Man"

Santa Claus Is A Black Man

I heard this on cbc radio last night and just had to post it.

The true meaning of Chanukah

Chanukah beyond oil:
The green menorah covenant
Beth Brewer
As Jewish people light candles on the eight days of Chanukah they can also take eight steps to lessen their environmental impact.
By Rabbis Arthur Waskow and Jeffrey Sultar Published: 11/29/2007

PHILADELPHIA (JTA) -- There are three levels of wisdom through which Chanukah invites us to address the planetary dangers of the global climate crisis -- what some of us call "global scorching" because "warming" seems so pleasant, so comforting.

We can encode these three teachings into
actions we take to heal the Earth each of the eight days.

1. The Talmud's legend that for the Maccabees to rededicate the Temple desecrated by the Seleucid Empire, it took only one day’s oil to meet eight days' needs: a reminder that if we have the courage to change our lifestyles to conserve energy, it will sustain us.

2. The vision of the Prophet Zechariah, whose visionary passages are read on Shabbat Chanukah, that the Temple Menorah was itself a living being, uniting the world of "nature" and "humanity" -- for it was not only fashioned by human hands in the shape of a Tree of Light, as Torah teaches, but was flanked by two olive trees that fed olive oil directly into it. What better symbol of how intertwined we are with the wounded earth that sustains us?

3. The memory that a community of "the powerless" led by people as determined as the Maccabees can overcome a great empire, giving us courage to face our modern corporate empires of Oil and Coal when they defile our most sacred Temple: Earth itself. And the reminder, again from Zechariah, that we triumph "Not by might and not by power but by My Spirit [in Hebrew, 'b'ruchi,' or 'my breath,' 'My wind!'], says YHWH, the Infinite Breath of Life."

We are taught not only to light the menorah but to publicize the miracle, to turn our individual actions outward for the rest of the world to see and be inspired by.

So this Chanukah might be just the moment to join in The Shalom Center's Green Menorah Covenant for taking action -- personal, communal and political -- to heal the Earth from the global climate crisis.

After lighting your menorah each evening, dedicate yourself to making the changes in your life that will allow our limited sources of energy to last for as long as they are needed, and with minimal impact on our climate.

No single action will solve the global climate crisis, just as no one of us alone can make enough of a difference. Yet if we act on as many of the areas below as possible, and act together, a seemingly small group of people can overcome a seemingly intractable crisis. We can, as in days of old, turn this time of darkness into one of light.

Day 1: Personal/Household: Call your electric-power utility to switch to wind-powered electricity. (For each home, 100 percent wind-power reduces carbon dioxide emissions the same as not driving 20,000 miles in one year.)

Day 2: Synagogue, Hillel or JCC: Urge your congregation or community building to switch to wind-powered electricity.

Day 3. Your network of friends, IM buddies and members of civic or professional groups to which you belong: Connect with people like newspaper editors, real estate developers, architects, bankers, etc. to urge them to strengthen the green factor in all their decisions, speeches and actions.

Day 4 , which this year is Shabbat. Automobile: If possible, choose today or one other day a week to not use your car. Other days, lessen driving. Shop on-line. Cluster errands. Car pool. Don’t idle engine beyond 20 seconds.

Day 5: Workplace or college: Urge the top officials to arrange an energy audit. Check with utility company about getting one free or at low cost.

Day 6: Town/City: Urge town/city officials to require greening of buildings through ordinances and executive orders. Creating change is often easier on the local level.

Day 7: State: Urge state representatives to reduce subsidies for highways, increase them for mass transit.

Day 8: National: Urge your senators to strengthen and pass the Lieberman-Warner “America’s Climate Security Act.” For easy addressing and a model letter to send them, go to http://salsa.democracyinaction.org/o/602/t/4181/campaign.jsp?campaign_KEY=21544.

Give our planet a Happy Chanukah!

Rabbi Arthur Waskow is the director of The Shalom Center, the author of many books on "down-to-earth Judaism" and a frequent speaker at Jewish institutions. Rabbi Jeff Sultar is the director of The Shalom Center 's Green Menorah Covenant. For more information on the covenant, contact Rabbi Sultar at greenmenorah@shalomctr.org.

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